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Monday, October 26, 2009

Managerial Personality

Pregnancy Update:

There is no update. Everything's the same, except I have to go see the midwife today to check my blood pressure etc. If I thought I could get away with it, without hurting the baby, I'd order me up some Xanax in a heartbeat because I am just an unbelievable ball of anxiety. You know I tend to be pretty high strung anyway, and a ridiculous control freak I have a managerial personality, so just imagine how I am right now. I would drink some wine or something but I don't like it enough to spend fifteen bucks on a bottle, and I have a feeling the little dollar bottles at the grocery store aren't worth the drive.

So instead I'm using my hypergraphic tendencies to write pages of random thoughts. Here are a few.

If I got a tattoo, it would be tiny little baby footprints walking up the tops of my feet.

When I get some money, I am going to buy a new mattress, get a land survey, and find some crap to build a hen house with.

If soda were that bad for you, it wouldn't flow freely from fountains.

I'm thinking that what we really need to fix our health care system is a bunch of monkeys pounding on pianos. Well, actually, it wouldn't fix the problem at all, but it would take our minds off it for a little while.

What if I feel like I'm going to have a crap, but instead, out pops the baby?

Dammit, Sun, will you just go away? People are trying to be depressed around here.

2 comments:

Jenny said...

Your blog makes me laugh :-) Monkeys pounding on pianos... Ha!

Hampers said...

You seems to be a very humorous person. Nice way to write a blog "monkeys pounding on pianos" Love this sentence. enjoyed it very much.