Once again, dear Lisa has saved the day. Turns out Ohio isn't that far south of here, and their weather's a lot like ours. Which basically means it's winter there, just like it is here. How disappointing. Come on Ohio, I had such high hopes for you. You couldn't move south for just a couple days? I bet you could, you just don't want to. You just want to be difficult. Well, whatever, Ohio. I won't go to your boring old zoo anyway.
I would have gone to the Cincinnati Zoo and froze my butt off. Literally. I would come home with no butt, because it would be frozen to some bench in Cincy. So you need to go over to Lisa's blog and thank her for saving my butt, because I bet it would look real stupid walking around without an ass. (Also she writes about funny stuff. If you like what I write you will like what she writes. And no she did not pay me to say that.)
So. This is the NEW PLAN. And it's not very spontaneous anymore, because we made reservations at a hotel. This is the first time ever in my whole life that I've made reservations anywhere. When we used to go exploring (which is Ninja-Speak for impromptu road trip) we'd just drive until we got tired and then we'd drive a bunch more finding a hotel, and then we'd pray it was decent. We found a bunch of drugs in one hotel room. That's another story in itself.
Anyway. We booked a hotel near Dayton, which is kind of between Cincinnati and the town where my stepdaughter lives. We're leaving Friday after EJ gets out of school, and head straight to the hotel. Depending on what time we get there, The Hub's ex-wife (who is actually quite nice and not one of those psycho ex-wives) is going to meet us at the hotel with M.
Then on Saturday we are going to drive to Kentucky. It's actually not as far away as I though. I could walk there in a week or so. Right across the river from Cincinnati is a town called Newport, and they have a fancy indoor aquarium, and I know this because Lisa told me. She totally saved the day.
The Newport Aquarium has penguins. And for twenty five bucks, you can hold a penguin. I will make sure to take a video of me holding a penguin for all of you. I bet it won't freak out because there are people who pay money all day long to hold the penguin. This penguin might let me make kissy faces at it. It might even let me actually kiss it on it's fuzzy warm cute little belly. It'll be Valentine's Day, after all.
And then, we'll go back to the hotel and chill out there with the room service and all for a couple days, and we'll drop M off at home on Monday and get back to Michigan.
Here is something funny I noticed about Kentucky and Ohio. Their abbreviations are KY and OH. Think about it.
My Mom Body (aaay_macaroni)
4 days ago