i pity the fool (me)

Today was a sad day for me. Nothing life-altering happened; there wasn't an illness or death or anything like that. But my feelings were hurt, and I just kind of need to write about it.

I spent the last three weeks making ribbon flowers for my grandma and my mom. They're not easy for me to make, because they require lots of handwork. I have hand issues, and we're not sure yet but the doctor thinks I may have rheumatoid arthritis. So it took me a long time to make the flowers, but they turned out beautiful, and I put them in a vase and arranged them all nice. I was so excited to give them to my grandma and my mom.

I gave my mom hers first. She seemed to like them okay, but she didn't fawn over them or show them to anyone or anything. That kind of hurt my feelings, but I thought, whatever. I knew my grandma would just love hers.

So my grandma comes and I give her the vase of flowers, and I told her I made them for her. And she just glanced at it and said "Oh, nice," and then set them aside. She didn't even really look at them. I stood there for a minute waiting for her to look at them but she didn't, and it got kind of awkward, so I walked away.

I must have had a funny look on my face, because my mom asked what was wrong. "Nothing," I said, and I went outside to take a breather.

I came in a couple minutes later, and I think my mom must have known what was going on because she completely patronized me. "You'll have to sit down and show me how you made these flowers," she gushed. "They're just so gorgeous." Well I could tell she wasn't being sincere. I mean I'm not an idiot. "Sure," I said, shrugging. "Whenever."

So then I had to sit through the whole visit, and my grandma had put her vase of flowers on the floor and my baby nephew kept pulling at them and trying to wreck them (but it's not his fault, he's a baby.) What upset me about that was that my grandma didn't even care.

I'll never make anyone anything again. No one appreciates what I do. The kids ruined their bunnies I made them, and their felt food is all lost, and now my mom and grandma don't even care about their flowers.

And then to top it all off, The Hub takes off for a three hour trip across the state to get a lawnmower. It's not that I want a break; I wanted today to be a happy day with my family, and it just didn't turn out that way.

Happy Mother's Day to me. No card, no gift, and just a bunch of slaps in the face.